About Di Kamp

Di Kamp is chief executive of Meta and has been involved in the field of developing people and organisations for 35 years. She has worked with a variety of organisations, and specialises in enabling senior managers to guide their organisations from good enough to excellence, and enabling management teams to lead their people in a way that will enhance their performance. Di has written several books, including manuals for trainers, one on staff appraisals, one on workplace counselling, one on improving your excellence as a trainer, one on people skills, and one on being a 21st century manager. She is currently preparing a further book on the secret of sustainable successful organisations.
Author Archive | Di Kamp

What Ride are You Choosing?

 

‘Have we not told you, life should be an adventure? If it were run-of-the-mill, you would have left it a long time ago. You need the sturm and drang, the passion, the highs and lows, to uncover the truth of who you are.

We get so caught up in our everyday lives, we forget what we came here for. See life as a game. It’s a game, it’s fun, it’s a rollercoaster, as we have told you before. It has its highs and lows, ups and downs, all arounds, but ultimately it’s all just a ride.

To find out what that’s all about, stand back and observe – where you get stuck, where you fly, where it scares you, where it exhilarates you, and concentrate on one goal, one goal alone: How does this help me to get to the truth of who I am?

Does it? Or does it get me stuck? Does it increase my fear? If the answer is yes to either of these questions, choose another path, get on a different ride!

There’s a whole fairground of rides. Some people like the rollercoaster, some the waltzers, some like the slow Ferris wheel, some the house of horrors. They are all beautifully different, so if you feel your ride no longer fits or suits you, change to another one! Go sit on the rollercoaster even if it does sometimes scare you.  Or go sit on the roundabout and take it gently.

You are all grown-ups, you have the right to choose what sort of ride you want your life to be. So choose, choose now – and if you don’t like it, stop that ride, get off and go get an easier one for a while.

It’s your choice. You create what is the ride of your life. So create one that suits you, and have the courage to say, “no, this ride no longer suits me. I’ll choose another – I’ll create another life/ride that suits me.” And hey presto, you have the life you always wanted. It’s that easy.

We would say that you will probably get through a lot of rides, because at different times in your life, you will need different things. And eventually you will come to the ride that takes you to the truth of who you are, and once you are on that one, you will never want to come off, because it’s home.

(Thank you to Jo and his angels for this text)

Homework

  1. What sort of a ride are you on at the moment?
  2. Does it suit you right now?
  3. Is it helping you to get to the truth of who you are?
  4. If not, what ride do you fancy?

 

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Holidays

 

WORKSHOP – HOLIDAYS -08.01

Holidays were originally holy days, days off work to celebrate special days in the church calendar, while in the US they have vacations, which originally means leaving something empty or unoccupied.

Both words imply stopping the everyday routine and stepping away from it to reflect on the larger picture of life.

We all need these breaks from routine to take stock, to refresh ourselves and to regain perspective. They are an essential part of our pattern for living, because they allow us a space, a review period, when we can run a check on what is and isn’t working in our lives, and rest before regaining our momentum.

So make sure that you take some time out over the summer period. Don’t just fill your time with lots of activities – have a do-nothing space, where you just ‘catch up with yourself’ as my mum used to say.

Homework

  1. Plan at least a day of doing nothing, preferably away from your home
  2. Plan at least another day of doing something non-productive that will just be fun
  3. Enjoy any holiday you take!

 

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Gaining Perspective

Have you had a summer holiday? I remember when I went to Italy during the summer and was lucky enough to spend three days in Sicily whilst Etna was erupting. We were able to see the incredible sight of a red river of lava, and hear and feel the immense rumbling and thundering which accompanies the eruption.

When stood by such a powerful example of nature at its work, you have to recognise how mundane and temporary our own stories are by comparison.

Whether we are disrupted by changes happening in our lives, or feeling powerful and important because we are being change agents in some way, the immensity of what nature does reminds us to get it all back into perspective.

Who we are and what we do is important and we do have an impact on the world, but we need to be reminded sometimes that there is more to it than our little piece, and we have to work in accord with the grander plan. We also need to remember that whatever is happening now in our lives, this too will pass, and life goes on.

Homework

  1. What experience of nature has reminded you to regain perspective on your life? Remember it again now
  2. What life event at the time seemed all-consuming, but has now become less important, merely another lesson, when you look back? Reflect on its true perspective in your life.
  3. In what way are you working in accord with the grander plan? Reflect on how you play your part.

 

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Appreciating Difference

As we start a New Year, we usually all resolve to do something different. Most of the time, our resolutions are about being a better person in some way.

For me, a speech given by Bill Clinton as the Dimbleby lecture made me think about how judgmental we can be. It is so easy to, as he said, ‘put people in boxes’.

I have seen and spoken to a variety of old friends this Christmas. Some of them are housewives, some are chief executives, and some have still not decided what they want to do with their lives. They provide me with plenty of opportunities to put them in boxes: good/bad use of their talents; boring/interesting; as they were/changed – the list goes on and on.

But whatever it is that they are doing or not doing, they are all special human beings. And if this is true of so many different people that I know, perhaps it is true of those I don’t know so well.

So my New Year’s resolution is to be more appreciative of the value of people’s differences, and to delight in our common humanity. It’s easy with some, and harder with others, but it is undoubtedly a great way to change the world a little more!

Homework

  1. Look at yourself and notice where you judge yourself to be lacking in some way. Now appreciate that quality in yourself – it makes it easier to do the same with other people.
  2. Take 3 people you know and identify what makes them special
  3. Smile with an open heart at the next person you see whom you have judged to be deficient in some way

 

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Friendship

Over the last couple of months I have really become aware of just how many wonderful friends I have. They come from all the different stages and environments of my life, ranging from people I’ve known since school days, to people I have met through work, to the people who run our local general store.

And they have made my somewhat turbulent life easier in all sorts of ways: by giving me a delicious sandwich for a picnic lunch as I was rushing off; sharing a laugh and a bottle of wine; listening to me when I was upset; doing a task they knew I would put off – the list goes on and on.

This has made me realise yet again just how precious friendship is, and what a difference it makes to our life. It is vital to reaffirm friendships, and continue to build them.

At Meta we firmly believe in making friends with our customers and suppliers. It is much more fun than having a distant, purely professional relationship, and brings joy into parts of work that people often have problems with. When we phone or make direct contact with people, we look forward to the conversation, and we believe that they usually enjoy the chat too.

Wouldn’t life be different if most of those you dealt with in your everyday life were friends of yours??

Homework

  1. Express your appreciation of the friendship of those around you
  2. Treat a customer or supplier as you would a friend – just chat to them like a real human being and be interested in them and their world.
  3. Be a good friend to someone by just doing a little something which makes a positive difference in their lives.

 

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Are You Spiritually Intelligent?

It sounds so high and mighty, doesn’t it – spiritual intelligence..  I know that when I first came across the phrase, I thought that it would be something to do with being saintly and I knew that I would never match up!

Yet actually, it is more to do with being in touch with your heart and living your life to the full. Characteristics of those who have developed their spiritual intelligence are such things as enthusiasm, energy, cheerfulness, persistence, peacefulness and compassion. They are not a million miles away from being a reasonable human being who hasn’t lost all their delightful childlike attributes.

My mother-in law was a prime example of this, although she wouldn’t claim it for herself. Whatever happened, her attitude was ‘oh well, I expect it will work out for the best’ and her only concern was that no-one should be hurt by it. At 82, she delighted in riding her bicycle, going to her clubs, being in her garden, watching the snooker on tv and receiving presents on her birthday – see what I mean about childlike?

We all have these attributes in us – we were born with them. So how are you demonstrating your spiritual intelligence?

Homework

  1. Find 3 things each day to be grateful for
  2. Enjoy and use your sense of humour
  3. Find 5 minutes to be peacefully quiet for the next few weeks

 

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Being Doing Having

Don’t we all say, sometimes: ‘If only I could win the lottery, then I could go on lots of holidays (or whatever our own dream is) and I would be happy.  Yet every ancient philosophy in the world tells us that it actually works the other way round …. ‘If I choose to be happy, then I do things differently, and I can have anything I want’.

This is very challenging for our minds, which have been trained in the western culture of striving to attain.  We almost want to make it impossible to achieve our dreams, because that proves that we were right – only the lucky ones can do that, and they are very few.

Yet at a gut instinct level, we all know that when we are feeling good, we respond to things differently, and the world seems to work better for us.  It seems worth experimenting with, since we are, most of us, not about to win the lottery!  What would happen if you decided to be happy today?

Homework :

  1. Choose to be happy today, and just notice what happens.
  2. Act as if everything is working well for you for a day, and notice what happens.
  3. At least, practise smiling for a day, and notice what happens!
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Prejudices

It was World Aids Day yesterday and I was collecting for Aids charities and giving out red ribbons. The city was very busy with people doing their Christmas shopping, so it would seem as if it were a good time to be collecting for a cause. And of course there were many people who gave generously.

But there were also many people who studiously avoided us, and even some who made the effort to come and tell us that we were ‘doing the devil’s work’ to cite one of them!

It made me think about our prejudices – the way we make a judgement about something on relatively little information and refuse to consider any further evidence.

We all have prejudices, and some of them are useful, because they incline us to be kinder or more thoughtful. But we need to remember that the world is full of people who are different from us – not better or worse, just different.

It is the Christmas season, the season of goodwill towards all. For the next few weeks, let’s just check out if our prejudices are useful, and if not, perhaps we can suspend our judgement for long enough to offer some goodwill towards someone who we would normally have judged as not good enough in some way…

Homework

  1. Buy a copy of Big Issue next time you pass someone selling
  2. Smile at someone you work with who has always evoked a negative prejudice in you.
  3. List your useful prejudices and use them!

 

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Remembering

We think of remembering as being linked to the past, but the word really means putting the pieces together – re-membering.

Spring is a great time to remember – to look at what you have and what you need to bring back together again. Nature is doing that right now. Plants you had forgotten about are showing their heads above ground again, and delighting you with their re-appearance.

We can do the same. What, during the long winter, has slipped away from your life? It may be walking out in the air and taking a breather, or it may be visiting with friends, or it may be allowing yourself to dream, to believe in possibilities.

As nature re-balances and grows itself again, so we need to re-balance ourselves, and grow our lives, our dreams

It doesn’t matter what level it is on – life-changing or just a simple way of enhancing your everyday – it’s a good time to re-member it!

Homework

  1. Take 5 minutes to think of something simple which has lost its place in your life and then do something to bring it back in – make that phone call, take that break now.
  2. Think of something that matters to you about the balance in your life and find a simple way of regaining some balance
  3. Think of something you want to grow in your life, and plan the first steps.

 

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THE HEALING POWER OF LAUGHTER

This week I was having one of those weeks when everything seemed too much: everyone seemed to be making unreasonable demands on me, I had an overwhelming list of things to do and it all looked like drudgery – sound familiar?

And then a good friend phoned and quickly picked up on my mood, and responded by making me laugh – big, belly laughs that continued long after the conversation was finished. My belly ached, but What a gift!! Nothing felt quite so important or overwhelming anymore, the tension had gone out of my body and mind, and paradoxically, I set to with a new vigour on my list of tasks, and cleared heaps of it!

Laughter is such a simple thing, that we sometimes forget how powerful it is. Physically, mentally and emotionally it is a healthy way to release tensions and negativity. Laughter reconnects us to our souls, our child-like nature, to our enjoyment of life.

Laughter is proven to trigger the release of endorphins (our pleasure giving drug) into our brains, and helps refill our ‘feel good’ tank when it is empty. When our energy tanks are full again, it’s always good to share a laugh or two with others, after all laughter was made to share! In fact it is incredibly infectious! So go ahead and spread some Laughter!

So…Homework:

  1. What do you have to make you laugh out loud? – Note if your list is short you may need to go out and buy yourself a funny treat!
  2. Help someone else to laugh this month – when life is getting them down make them laugh

 

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