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BEING FREE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE

By on August 8, 2010 in health+well being, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Reducing stress, Resourcing yourself, Working smarter

You can also listen to a podcast of this Workshop.
[audio:metaspirit_workshop_being_free.mp3|titles=Being free to live your life]
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Life is for the living.

At least that’s what they say. I’m not quite sure who ‘they’ are, but one thing is for sure, there are not many of us who can honestly say that they are free to live the life they want to?

We like to blame circumstance, or others for our life not being how we’d like it to be, but ultimately I feel that the block lies with us. Continue Reading →

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SLOW DOWN!

By on June 20, 2010 in health+well being, Meta Org Blog, Reducing stress, Resourcing yourself, Working smarter

You can also listen to a podcast of this Workshop

[audio:metahome_podcast_slow_down.MP3|titles=Slow Down!]

Download the podcast

Have you noticed how the days have become a non-stop dash for many of us, much of the time?  We jump out of bed, do our morning ‘stuff’. Hurry to bus or train or car, get to work, and start immediately on the ‘to do’ list.  Even after the daily dash through as much as we can get done at work, we don’t often slow down.  It’s home, tea, maybe more work, the children, and finally we collapse in bed, to have a rest ready for the next daily dash.

Are weekends any better?  Gardens, housework, kids’ activities, socialising, maybe some of the jobs we didn’t get done this week at work – the weekend can easily turn into another list of chores.

Your poor bodies and minds and hearts!!  What happened to us?  We wouldn’t fit in breathing if it wasn’t automatic!!  And we are paying a high price for all this dashing: high blood pressure, bad backs, viruses that knock us flat for days, barely surviving relationships, poor digestion.  It doesn’t even give us real compensatory rewards:  do you ever finish that ‘to do’ list, at home or at work?  Do people praise you and love you for your out-of-control Protestant work ethic?

I know, I know, it’s hard to break the habit; it seems to be what’s expected of us; if I don’t, what might happen?

So my challenge is this: can you find a few spaces in each day to just slow down for a while?

  • How about 5 minutes in the morning, just tasting your breakfast/coffee/tea?
  • How about 10 minutes around lunchtime, just walking slowly and noticing what’s around you?
  • How about 15 minutes when you first get home, sitting quietly or strolling round the garden?
  • How about 20 minutes before bed, just relaxing?

 

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THE SIMPLE REMINDERS

By on September 1, 2007 in health+well being, Resourcing yourself, Self awareness

It is so easy to get caught up in busyness isn’t it! We have so many things to do, and never seem to get to the end of it.

I have been given the opportunity to write this month’s update, and at first I thought, ‘I am too busy…’ Then I thought again, and realised that it was the perfect time to consider what the busyness is all about. After all, we are called human beings, not human doings!

When I am being me, I tend to be gentler, less hurried, and I pay attention to the important things. I have time to walk with my granddaughter, Amber, stopping at every cat, every flower, and enjoying them. I have time to talk, with friends and strangers, and enjoy the conversation. I have time to appreciate being in my home, and the pleasure of making it really feel like mine.

When I am thinking about what I have to do, I become more rushed, more stressed, notice the lacks rather than the positives more.

Do I end up doing nothing if I allow myself to be before I get into doing? No. I do what I have to do, with more heart involved, with more effectiveness. Our being is driven by our hearts, our doing is driven by our heads. My heart will allow my head in, but my head is less willing to give space for the heart as well.

And when I die, I would like to think that people will describe me in terms of how I was, and how I approached things, not what I did. None of us want an epitaph that just says: ‘She worked hard, and did lots of things.’

We sometimes forget that everyday spirituality consists of a smile, a friendly and patient ear, a kind word, a thoughtful gesture, a sense of humour. Our spirits thrive when our heart is brought into whatever we are doing, and when we remember that we are above all about being.

So next time you are about to rush into the next task, just stop for a moment, and allow yourself to be, then take your heart into what you are doing, and help to change the world.

 

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GOING SLOW

By on June 1, 2006 in health+well being, Resourcing yourself

Some years ago, I read a book called “Stopping “ by David Kudtz.  It made an impression on me, I think mainly because I rarely did – stop, that is!  And, for a short while, I did put some “stops” into my life – times when I did nothing, and just allowed life to go by for an hour or two – but it didn’t really stick as a habit.

Now having just spent some time in one of my favourite places, Provence in France, I have realised that one of the reasons I love it there is because the cultural habit is going slow.  I may not have learnt to stop, but I’m pretty good at going slow some of the time, and I’m inclined to increase the habit.

When you sit down in a pavement café, the waiters assume you are going slow, so they don’t rush to serve you, or to ask for payment.  This is not poor service, it’s respectful service, respecting your right to go slow.

It is easy to become impatient when you are used to an “instant response and action” type of life, yet relax into the go slow culture, and you begin to notice the advantages:

  • Proper attention paid to detail – the arrangement of food, the laying of the table
  • Time for contact between human beings – smiles, conversations
  • Things get done, effectively and pleasantly
  • No tempers of frustration, but a tranquil atmosphere
  • A sense of spaciousness in time, instead of it rushing by
  • Room to notice what’s happening around you

OK, it may not be appropriate in our culture to run on “go slow” time all the time.  And sometimes, we may give ourselves permission to slow down for an hour or two in the day, and take that time to reflect, to refresh ourselves.

I love go slow starts to the day, with time to consider, before rushing into action.  And gardening is definitely a go slow activity for me. Maybe it is reading the Sunday newspaper, or having a meal or drink with friends for you.

And how else can we put some go slow time into our busy lives?  I intend to experiment, because I feel so much more as if I’m living my life when I go slow for a while.  I also regain perspective, and feel refreshed by that change of pace.  Why not join me in the experimentation, and see what some “going slow” does for you!!

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THE WASTE OF IT ALL

By on October 8, 2005 in health+well being, Living fully

We hear a lot about global warming these days, and the dire consequences of doing nothing about it, since it is a man-made problem. However, it can leave us feeling powerless to make a difference, since it seems to be up to governments to change their policies.

We forget that global warming is a direct consequence of the pollution caused by our emissions, which come from the never-ending increase in producing ‘stuff’ and using our energy sources.

Every single one of us can make a difference by our own practices, and it is not hard to do. Many people already recycle, because there are now kerbside collections in many areas. If you don’t, do! We have no kerbside collections here, but we do have recycling facilities next to the supermarket, and it is not hard to put stuff on one side and take it down when you go shopping.

And remember that:

  • Paper includes envelopes, documents, letters, magazines etc., not just newspapers.
  • Card includes all those boxes that our food comes in, cereal boxes, pizza boxes etc.
  • Glass includes the jars we get, not just wine and beer bottles.

The other form of recycling is ensuring that everything you throw out is really worn out. Charity shops will take clothes and books and bric-a-brac that are in good condition, which you just don’t want any more. And in most areas there is a homeless charity that will take electrical goods if they are in reasonable nick.

Finally, if you have a garden, do put your waste veg and fruit on a compost heap. It improves your soil no end, and is easy to manage.

Then there is the reduction of waste through using less. This is not about depriving yourself – it is more about being conscious of what you are doing.

For example:

  • A shower uses so much less water than a bath, so keep the baths to a minimum.
  • And turn the tap off while you brush your teeth, and only turn it on again to rinse your mouth.
  • Take your own carrier bags to the supermarket, or buy one of the ‘bags for life’ most of them are now selling.
  • And turn down that extra carrier bag or plastic bag when you are shopping and put your purchases in the other bags you have.

Why should we bother?

When I was in India, I noticed that people were really good at recycling. Their motivation was probably more immediate – when everything is precious to you, and you don’t have the money to replace easily, you use things more carefully, and more imaginatively! Most of us are not in that situation.

Our immediate world may not be in crisis, but the world in general is. We are running out of energy and water, and our everyday lives are beginning to be affected by the overall global warming. We may be able to live with it now, but what about our children, and their children?

And when it is easy to make a difference, it gives us a way of feeling that we are contributing to the solution instead of the problem – always a good feeling!

If you would like to find out more about the causes and effects of global warming, or how to make a difference as an individual, go to: www.foe.co.uk/campaigns/waste/issues/reduce_reuse_recycle/

 

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CONNECTIONS

By on May 8, 2005 in emotional intelligence, health+well being, relating to others

We had just finished an open programme in Meta, and the last day felt very emotional. The people who were on the programme were not just the participants, they are our friends. Over the time we had been working together, the relationship between us had developed into a real connection that does not finish with the end of the programme. And at Meta, we delight in those real connections, and love the fact that our circle of friends is constantly being extended.

It reminds me that one of the joys of being alive is that we can have so many connections: with people we meet, with those who sing and write for us, with the world around us. Yet many people do not exploit the wonder of this phenomenon.

The value of connections

We have been well taught to ‘stand on our own two feet’, and for many of us that means that we try not to rely on others and plough our own furrows.

Yet our connections can enrich our lives significantly, if we only dare trust to them. Being connected doesn’t mean a dependency on others, it means recognising our interdependence.

My friendships give me a lot of joy, and a place to give back as well. Between us, we create a better world. Those who write and sing inspire me and calm me, and I respond by taking their message further. My garden thrives because I look after it, but it also feeds me both literally and metaphorically.

When we entered the scientific age in the 17th century, we learned to regard ourselves as separate from the world, from others, and we lost the magic of that interconnectedness. Most of us have been educated to think that we still have that separation, and yet we know in our hearts that it is not true.

Today, remember your connections:

  • Smile at another human being
  • Delight in someone’s words or music
  • Phone a friend you haven’t spoken to for a while
  • Go talk to a plant!
  • Re-connect with the magic of the world!

 

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WHAT IS WELL-BEING?

By on February 12, 2004 in health+well being, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself

I have read many books on improving your life. They range from the ‘quick-fix’ Western-style self-help books to the great philosophical and spiritual masters, and there is no doubt that I have learnt from their words of wisdom, and been reminded again and again of techniques and mind-sets that help us to find well-being.

Yet examples of people living in their well-being seem few and far between in our culture. And then I spend ten days in India, and I experience hundreds of examples: the ‘room-boy’ at our hotel, the shop-keeper selling sacks, the priest in the temple, the woman sitting at her stall of fruit, the man who made the naan bread in the street restaurant – everywhere I looked, I could see people with a ready smile, a sense of purpose, and an ability to appreciate the small daily pleasures of being alive.

What have we lost? And how can we regain it? It is clearly not linked to wealth or status, but to a mindset that filters for the reasons to celebrate being alive.

It seems to me that we have learnt too well how to forget what really matters in life. As human beings, we need to feed our bodies, our minds and our spirits on a daily basis, in order to feel whole, and have a sense of well-being. Yet often we are too busy to do this.

We may stuff our bodies with food, but do we eat well, do we care for our bodies? We may stuff our minds with thoughts, but do they nurture and expand our minds, or just cause them to contract with fears and anxieties? And how often do we even consider feeding our spirit?

This weekend you could take the opportunity to stop and consider how you can enhance your well-being.

  1. 1.  Feeding our bodies

We have become used to eating too much. How about having one day where you only eat fresh food, freshly prepared, that you really fancy. And on that day, treat your body well – a massage, a gentle walk, a long bath – something to care for your body.

  1. 2.  Feeding the mind

Most of us have a good book that we haven’t got round to reading. It may be an inspirational one, or just a really good story – and if you don’t have any, look at some of our reviews for ideas! Give yourself a couple of afternoons to sit cosy and warm, with a good book – or if you aren’t a reader, choose a ‘feel-good’ movie instead!

  1. 3.  Feeding the spirit

Our world is full of simple ways of feeding our spirits. We know our spirit is being fed when we can’t help but smile, when we feel that warm glow of pleasure. Nature is a rich source of spirit food: the delight of a crisp winter’s day, the sound of a river or stream. Or really take the time to watch your children’s excitement at something new, or just smile at strangers in the street, and see how many smile back!

We may all lead busy lives, but we need to remember to live each day, not just get through it. There is always time to give a little food to our bodies, our minds and our spirits.

Maybe then we will be closer to well-being.

 

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ESSENTIALS OF LIFE ‘ OUR SENSE OF TOUCH

By on January 6, 2004 in health+well being, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself

Have you stopped and really felt the sun on your face or back?  It is one of the most life giving sensations we experience, particularly after a long, dull, wet winter.

Have you touched a feathery –looking plant, and delighted in its softness, a caress from nature just for you.

Have you reached out to another human being, and felt the warmth of a mutual hug, where both of you are reminded that we are essentially loving and feeling creatures?

So many of us are too busy and wrapped up in our own worlds to stop and take a moment to touch and feel the texture and warmth of the world around us.  Yet our sense of touch enriches the experience we have of the world around us.

Some friends visited recently, with their young son.  He looked at all the things in my house, then went round and picked things up and felt them.  He even put some of them in his mouth to taste them!  Children know that to really experience what something has to offer, you need to try it out with as many senses as possible.  This knowing doesn’t go away as we grow up – it just gets buried under the instructions to not touch, not to put things in your mouth, not to stare.

Many of us find it unattractive to shop on the internet, and I suspect that the inability to ‘get a feel’ for something plays a part in that.  Next time you are in a shop. Just watch how many people pick things up and look at them, often unconscious of how important the feel of the object is.

Don’t deprive yourself of touching!  Reach out to everything and everyone that gives you pleasure, and allow yourself to be enriched for that moment.

HOMEWORK

  1. Hug someone everyday
  2. Don’t just look at a lovely plant, get a feel for it as well
  3. Notice the sunshine on your skin

 

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INTEGRITY

By on August 10, 2003 in Excellent organisations, health+well being, Self awareness

At Meta we are committed to running and helping you run your business with integrity. A business built on the core principles of integrity is a business that has a recipe for success.

So often we hear the word integrity, but what do we mean when we speak about integrity?  What pops to mind for most people are the words honesty and truth, and most definitely they are a very core part of integrity.  But it is also interesting to consider that what makes integrity so powerful in our lives and our businesses is that integrity is also about reliability. So I would invite you to consider that:

  • Integrity is about doing what you promised to do,
  • when you promised to do it – no exceptions
  • Integrity is about not making excuses for promises broken
  • Integrity is about taking responsibility and owning up to others when we have gone back on what we said we would do
  • Integrity is about being honest and truthful even when that’s not popular or comfortable

We can be out of integrity with others, but just as much with ourselves. I know the numerous times I have promised to do something good for myself, and I don’t. Consider for a moment: if we can’t keep our promises to ourselves, how can we do it with others…??

I have found that when I restore my integrity and follow through on my promises to myself and others, I have a sense of freedom and openness that was not there before. All I am doing is acknowledging that this is important to me and I am re-choosing to do it.  If I have a promise to someone else that I have not made good on, then I communicate that to that person, honestly, and make sure that, from that point on, I follow through on my word.

Our lives flourish when we live from a place of integrity,  so why not make it easier on yourself and others, keep your promises, it enables you and others the freedom to be the best that you and they can be.

Homework
1. List the areas of your life where you have some broken promises, or promises not fulfilled- be honest, but don’t beat yourself up, you are just taking a look.
2. Now go through your list and choose the top three promises that would be most beneficial for you to restore, either a promise to yourself or to others.  If you have more than 3 on your list, make a promise to yourself to keep going back to your list.
3. Continue to notice where in your life you are in integrity and where not, and decide to act out of integrity, and see what happens.

 

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VITALITY

By on March 6, 2003 in health+well being, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself, Ways of thinking

The sun is shining this morning as I write this, and if I were a child, I would know that it was a wonderful day.

Yet as an adult, my view of the moment is coloured by all the other things I am told about how the world is working, through the news, magazines etc. so rather than celebrate the glorious day, I can easily get caught up in the difficulties and doom and gloom and forget to just live today.

Who has it right??

It seems that we normally need a life threatening event to wake us up to the beauty of the moment by moment of life, but there is no rule that I know of that says that we have to wait for something traumatic to be able to really appreciate and delight in being alive.

When I was little, I went to Sunday school, and I can still remember being told that I should count my blessings each day. What a lovely concept! And over the years, I have come to understand how useful that can be. We always have a choice: to moan about all the things that are wring, for us personally and in the world in general, or to count our blessings. Which makes me feel better? Which makes me more able to handle whatever comes my way? The answer seems so obvious!

I went to see Bruce Springsteen perform this week. I had a bad back, and could have made it worse by standing in a stadium with thousands of others. But I knew better. I knew that there are few better cures for feeling miserable than to go and be inspired by the sheer joie de vivre of this performer! For three hours, I danced, sung and laughed with delight, as he took us on a journey of celebrating being alive.

As Bruce would say: ‘ How can we get this thing started? Let’s have a party!’ So come on, count your blessings and celebrate being alive!

Homework

  1. Stop for a moment and count your blessings today
  2. Find four things to delight in today
  3. Give yourself a present today
  4. Do this every day for a month, no matter what is going on in your life

 

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