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THE ESSENTIALS OF LIFE ‘ COLOUR

By on March 7, 2004 in emotional intelligence, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself

I was in my garden this weekend, enjoying the sunshine.  The blues, reds, oranges and yellows of the flowers contrasted beautifully with different shades of green in the leaves, stems, trees and grass.  And it was all enlivened by the light of the sun.  This stunning spectacle is free, and available in some form to all of us, because our world is coloured – aren’t we lucky!

And colours give us more than just a spectacle – they evoke words and feelings.  It is interesting to me that a long time ago, colours were linked to our chakras – the energy centres in our bodies.  Yet it is only relatively recently that we in the west started considering the effect that different colours have on our moods and energy.

I recently redecorated my living room.  It had been red and stone colours, and now it is in all shades of green.  Everyone who comes into it remarks on how tranquil it feels, even if they know nothing about the effect of colours – the power of a colour change!

We are lucky to have such a remarkable range of colours available to us and can use them, not just to delight the eye, but also to help us enhance or change our mood.  What colours delight you?  What colours make you feel good?  Do you allow yourself to enjoy them enough?

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THE TROUBLE WITH MONEY

By on January 3, 2003 in emotional intelligence, Meta Org Blog, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

Do you ever worry about not having enough money?  For living, for that holiday, for retirement ……  I know, I can sometimes get caught in the scarcity fears – by the way, if you don’t, please let us know your “secret”?!!

Yet I know that when I think poor, I am poor, and when I think abundance, I notice abundance.  Does this make any sense to you?

We are taught to regard money as the means of being wealthy in our culture, and also to always feel as if we don’t have enough.

Yet we live in an abundant world, where happiness comes from snowdrops flowering, not from money in the bank.  Snowdrops herald the arrival of Spring, first signs of new growth. Money in the bank causes us anxiety, as interest rates go down and it loses value even when we have it.

What would happen if we decided to be rich and enjoy the abundance of the world, instead of worrying about money?  Maybe then it would be put back into perspective.  It’s one of many forms of energy that we can share in.  Perhaps if we paid attention to some of the others, we would reduce the fear, and allow the money we need to come our way!

Just as the fear of losing a relationship can often be enough to become a self-fulfilling prophecy, perhaps the fear of not having enough money is the reason why so many of us seem to not have enough!

Why not experiment with putting money worries to one side for a month and instead enjoy the abundance of new growth in Spring, laughter with friends and the exuberance of children?

Homework :

  1. Buy yourself a small present to make you smile, no matter how poor you feel this month.
  2. Notice what makes you happy that doesn’t require money.
  3. Bless what money you do have and then give a little of it away!

 

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HOW I AM AFFECTS HOW I WORK WITH OTHERS – REALLY!!

By on September 4, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Excellent organisations, Leadership, Meta Org Blog, relating to others, Working smarter

‘I’ve always prided myself on being good at analytical/logical thinking, and when I was asked if I would like to go on a programme on developing my skills as a leader I thought I would learn to be even more logical and analytical. Half way through my first day all I could do was shake my head in disbelief.

We had spent the whole morning looking at ways I could make myself feel good and, although that was very pleasant, it felt both selfish and irrelevant to me as a leader.

The workshop facilitator persisted in looking at personal stuff for the rest of the afternoon, which was spent on how I think. Analytical? Nope! My intuition, for goodness sake! I haven’t used that since I was a child. I went home and told my wife that it was a most unexpected day. Two hours later she told me to shut up.

I was curious about the next day and had to admit I felt rather good about myself. As we began to explore what made a good leader I realised that I had what it took, but it wasn’t what I thought it was.

Since that five day session I think I have used about half of what I learned with Di – which is about 100%, at least, more than I have taken from other courses. It makes more and more sense, and it works. No, it really works.’

—————

Di says:

Adam spent the whole of the first day staring at me and shaking his head in disbelief. I could feel his gaze on me the whole time.

It’s a common reaction. At first many people think I am crazy. And I remind them that, when they do get themselves in a state where they feel good abut themselves, they are in a superb position to help others get more from their work.

Western society’s love affair with logical and analytical thought reflects a belief that science could solve all of our ‘problems’ This ‘logic’ breaks work down into boring and meaningless tasks, so that the work does not inspire and motivate, and ultimately the work gets done badly. Nice logic!

We have got to the stage in our culture where many of us think that work has to be boring, hard, stressful. If not, the story runs, we are not earning our money or our leisure time: “work hard, play hard’.

Homework

1. Enjoy your work today.

2. Give yourself some treats: stop and smell that flower, smile at that toddler, use your favourite soap, wear your favourite clothes.

3. Take a risk: go in after the traffic, leave your tie at home, leave your e-mails until you have spoken to everyone face-to-face

Enjoy your work today.

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Emotional Resilience

By on September 4, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Meta Org Blog, Ways of thinking

An aspect of emotional intelligence that we don’t often pay attention to is the ability to ‘bounce back’ when something unexpected happens. This can be anything from an unexpected traffic jam which makes you late, to a bereavement or drastic change of work circumstances. It is so easy to get knocked back in our culture. We tend to see the world as conspiring against us anyway, and so fall too easily into self-pity and being a victim of circumstance. If we were to view the world as ‘on our side’, then we would look for the gain from the change. When we develop emotional resilience, we react differently.

We forgive ourselves if our initial reaction is negative, and just let it go.

We pick ourselves up and get on with things, just like a child who has fallen over when learning to walk
We consider what the learning is for us in the particular circumstance, and actively take the learning.

Homework

Take an example where life dealt you an unexpected blow in the past. What have you/could you learn from it, in a positive sense?

Identify 4 ways in which the world has conspired with you, by offering you unexpected changes.
As you receive some ‘knock’ this month, stop and go through the process stated above.

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What is emotional intelligence?

By on September 4, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Meta Org Blog, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

So, what is it? It is the reminder that we all do have emotions and are often led to act by them, but if we don’t acknowledge their part in our decision-making, we are likely to be reactive rather than responsive. It used to be called wisdom, or common sense, but, as Robert Cooper says, the trouble with common sense is that it is rarely practised.

When you use your emotional intelligence, you recognise, value and use your emotional reactions constructively. You know that you are in control of your reactions, and consider the consequences before simply acting on them.

For example, we all get frustrated in a traffic jam. Not using your emotional intelligence leads to being driven by your frustration. So you end up stressed at least, and sometimes it can develop into road rage, or causing accidents.

And if you stop for a moment and consider, you realise that the frustration is not constructive, and will not change the situation. Using your emotional intelligence is more likely to lead to putting on some favourite music, thinking about some issue you have to resolve, or just enjoying the countryside you can see.

On the positive side, most of us have ‘had a good idea’ – something that came spontaneously, which we then dismissed as being impractical, irrelevant, or illogical. If we use our emotional intelligence, we often realise then, rather than when it is too late, that the idea is worth following through on.

Homework

Take 4 of your ‘instant reactions this week and just stop and ask yourself the following questions before either dismissing them or simply reacting:

1. How does this help me to live my life well?

2. How will this make a positive difference?

3. What will be the effect of this in the future?

As you hear the inner responses to the questions, make sure that you listen to your heart as well as your head – if your heart sings, you are on the right track!

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Are You Spiritually Intelligent?

By on September 4, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Self awareness

It sounds so high and mighty, doesn’t it – spiritual intelligence..  I know that when I first came across the phrase, I thought that it would be something to do with being saintly and I knew that I would never match up!

Yet actually, it is more to do with being in touch with your heart and living your life to the full. Characteristics of those who have developed their spiritual intelligence are such things as enthusiasm, energy, cheerfulness, persistence, peacefulness and compassion. They are not a million miles away from being a reasonable human being who hasn’t lost all their delightful childlike attributes.

My mother-in law was a prime example of this, although she wouldn’t claim it for herself. Whatever happened, her attitude was ‘oh well, I expect it will work out for the best’ and her only concern was that no-one should be hurt by it. At 82, she delighted in riding her bicycle, going to her clubs, being in her garden, watching the snooker on tv and receiving presents on her birthday – see what I mean about childlike?

We all have these attributes in us – we were born with them. So how are you demonstrating your spiritual intelligence?

Homework

  1. Find 3 things each day to be grateful for
  2. Enjoy and use your sense of humour
  3. Find 5 minutes to be peacefully quiet for the next few weeks

 

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THE HEALING POWER OF LAUGHTER

By on August 11, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Resourcing yourself

This week I was having one of those weeks when everything seemed too much: everyone seemed to be making unreasonable demands on me, I had an overwhelming list of things to do and it all looked like drudgery – sound familiar?

And then a good friend phoned and quickly picked up on my mood, and responded by making me laugh – big, belly laughs that continued long after the conversation was finished. My belly ached, but What a gift!! Nothing felt quite so important or overwhelming anymore, the tension had gone out of my body and mind, and paradoxically, I set to with a new vigour on my list of tasks, and cleared heaps of it!

Laughter is such a simple thing, that we sometimes forget how powerful it is. Physically, mentally and emotionally it is a healthy way to release tensions and negativity. Laughter reconnects us to our souls, our child-like nature, to our enjoyment of life.

Laughter is proven to trigger the release of endorphins (our pleasure giving drug) into our brains, and helps refill our ‘feel good’ tank when it is empty. When our energy tanks are full again, it’s always good to share a laugh or two with others, after all laughter was made to share! In fact it is incredibly infectious! So go ahead and spread some Laughter!

So…Homework:

  1. What do you have to make you laugh out loud? – Note if your list is short you may need to go out and buy yourself a funny treat!
  2. Help someone else to laugh this month – when life is getting them down make them laugh

 

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GIVE YOUR SPIRIT A LIFT

By on March 10, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself, Ways of thinking

Inspired by my own flagging spirit, this month’s workshop is a good dose of the nice medicine – for me too!

It’s all too easy to get caught up in the drama of life. After all, we did come here to forget what wondrous beings we truly are..but every now and again it’s good to catch ourselves out and let go of our ‘human frailties’ and remind ourselves of just how special we are. All it is, is that we have started to ‘believe the hype’ that we are just humans and forgotten our true nature. We have managed to forget where we put our angel wings and well and truly hidden away our inner self behind one, two or three big solid looking, locked doors. No wonder we start to feel that the world is conspiring against us…we’re conspiring against ourselves!!

So give yourself a break, and give your spirit a lift!

When you find yourself in the office or at home, and nothing seems to be going quite right – nothing major, just niggling little things. – what you need is a Spirit lift. This workshop is for you. Little things you can easily do, to give your spirit a lift and lighten your day. Renew your friendship with your-self and get back in touch with your spirit.

How we feel is reflected in what it is we create for ourselves in our lives. When we feel good, things generally go well and we attract good things into our lives. But when things falter, we tend to spiral very quickly into a negative mind-set and hey presto! We only seem to attract the not so good stuff.. If only we could catch ourselves before we slip too far…

Well here it is, the Meta-Spirit team’s: ‘recommended tasks for flagging spirits ‘ Go on give them a try! And please do send in any further suggestions to add to our list, because this list is by no means exhaustive.

RECOMMENDED TASKS FOR FLAGGING SPIRITS:

  • Buy yourself some sweets/chocolate (I bought ¾ lb of sweets today…my bad day, just got better!)
  • Phone a friend, or visit them – true friends have the magic ability to help you forget all your troubles, they help you remember how special you really are.
  • Treat yourself to a take-away on the way home – mmm..curry!
  • Cat/Dog Therapy – Here in the office we have ‘cat breaks’. Basically Angel and Funky come up and will literally stop you from working by walking all over the computer until you’ve had your 5 minute break! (as I write this, Funky is curled up in front of the computer keyboard, having given my spirit a lift)
  • Read something inspirational – I like to surround myself with books by inspirational people. Books to pick up and help you remember.
  • Music – I love music, and music can beat the blues any day and I recommend a good dose of Mozart to revive flagging spirits.
  • Walks – simple but effective – nature will always bring you back to the wonder of it all, and these crisp, sunny, autumnal mornings were created for us to share in.
  • Ice cream – brings back memories of my childhood, walks in the park and a 20p ‘99’ ice cream with raspberry sauce…what will it spark off in you?
  • Cookies – There’s a cookie monster in us all – go on let the monster loose!
  • Listening to something inspirational – Words of wisdom from your favourite spiritual teacher, never fails to reinvigorate a flagging soul.
  • Videos – curl up in front of the telly with your loved one, (cats make an excellent substitute if loved one not available), ice cream/sweets /cookies/popcorn/all of the above and watch your favourite video.

 

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Experimenting

By on March 10, 2002 in Change, emotional intelligence, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Ways of thinking

Why do we have to get it right first time, every time, or else we feel bad? It just doesn’t fit with our experience as humans does it? And it certainly doesn’t fit with being a learner! Actually we don’t call it experimenting, we call it ‘getting it wrong’ – no wonder it makes us feel bad!

Yet the way we grow in our lives is by trying things out, and gradually establishing what works for us. No, it’s even more than that, it is continually experimenting, because what works for us at one point, may change within moments, and as we move into it, we can see even more possibilities.

As children, this way of growing into our true selves comes naturally to us. We love to experiment and find different ways of doing things, thinking about things, and reacting to things. It is only a taught behaviour to try and find the ‘right’ answer that will last forever.

So let’s be children again! Let’s experiment and play with ideas and approaches. And don’t feel bad if your experiment is not perfect – be delighted that you have more exploring to do!

  1. Experiment with a different route home, or a new type of cereal for breakfast – anything that takes your fancy!
  2. Next time something doesn’t work quite how you intended, smile to yourself and say, ‘great! More experimenting to do!’ (OK, I know that’s a tough one, but it might at least make you laugh instead of being upset! After all, it’s not the end of the world!)
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Tune in, Turn on, Chill out.

By on March 5, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself

In the busy world of illusion, we have very little time to ourselves.

Everything has to be done now! – the kids need feeding, the garden needs weeding, got to get to work, got to go shopping, must visit dad, better do the hoovering, must put the washing on, gotta get home-we never stop! We never take a time-out from the hectic lives we lead.

We end up over-worked, stressed, out-of-balance, feeling empty/low/under appreciated, het-up and tense- so why not give yourself some appreciation, wash those daily hectic blues away!

In this month’s workshop we’ll be finding out about finding time for yourself.

How? It’s simple-really simple.

Just take 15 minutes a day that you dedicate to yourself. A time for you and you only, that no-one or no-thing can interrupt or interfere with.

Find a quiet place, sit in a comfortable position, light a candle or incense if you would like.

Put on some relaxing instrumental music or simply listen to the sounds of nature/life.

Close your eyes-and breathe.
Breathe in, breathe out – that’s all you have to do.

Initially your mind will probably fill with 101 things you have to do or sort out yet today, but just let the thoughts pass without connecting with them, and soon they will pass.

Continue breathing deeply, but naturally until the 15 minutes are up.

The great thing about this exercise is that it can be done anywhere: on the train or bus, as a passenger in a car, in the office, anywhere that you can shut your eyes for 15 minutes and breathe.

You should find yourself feeling lighter, thinking clearer and re-energised. Ideally it is a good start to the day and it is also good to aid peaceful sleep at night.

As you get used to taking the 15 minute ‘ Me Break ‘, you may find that 15 minutes is just not enough Me Time, so lengthen the time to suit your needs.

So To Re-cap

When you wake, or when you get stressed, or the strains of life are getting to you..

REMEMBER .. It’s time to:

1.Tune In: Find a quiet spot to tune in to your inner self and the body you inhabit.

2.Turn on: Just 15-20 mins a day gives you time to revitalise tired bodies and minds.

3.Chill out: Breathing deeply for 15-20 minutes will leave you feeling lighter, calmer and more relaxed.

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