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BEING YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND

By on March 7, 2003 in Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

It’s so easy to be hard on ourselves! We have all been well-trained in being critical, and we are great at turning that ability on ourselves. So we notice what we haven’t done rather than what we have done in a day, or we beat ourselves up for saying the wrong thing instead of remembering how often we say the right thing.

I bet you not only criticise yourself, you also sometimes reject praise or compliments by running yourself down! I know I can say things like, ‘ Oh it’s really someone else’s idea’, or ‘ no, I don’t look good today – your eyesight is obviously not as good as it was!’ This is not just insulting to the complimenter, it is also a less than useful message to yourself.

All this is telling ourselves that we are no good, and that is a lousy message to give anyone! So I want you to consider another possibility. Just for a while, imagine that you are your best friend. I bet the description of you would be different if they gave it! Friends are kinder to us than we are to ourselves, and they set us a good example of how we deserve to be treated. When we are treated kindly, we don’t get arrogant, we get even nicer! It reminds us of us at our best, and helps us to be like that more often.

So why not decide to be your own best friend for the rest of the month?

Homework

  1. Spend a few minutes describing your characteristics as if you were your own best friend.
  2. At the end of each day, find something to praise yourself about
  3. Next time you criticise yourself, remind yourself to be kind to you!
  4. Dare to give yourself a present for being such a lovely person!

 

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VITALITY

By on March 6, 2003 in health+well being, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself, Ways of thinking

The sun is shining this morning as I write this, and if I were a child, I would know that it was a wonderful day.

Yet as an adult, my view of the moment is coloured by all the other things I am told about how the world is working, through the news, magazines etc. so rather than celebrate the glorious day, I can easily get caught up in the difficulties and doom and gloom and forget to just live today.

Who has it right??

It seems that we normally need a life threatening event to wake us up to the beauty of the moment by moment of life, but there is no rule that I know of that says that we have to wait for something traumatic to be able to really appreciate and delight in being alive.

When I was little, I went to Sunday school, and I can still remember being told that I should count my blessings each day. What a lovely concept! And over the years, I have come to understand how useful that can be. We always have a choice: to moan about all the things that are wring, for us personally and in the world in general, or to count our blessings. Which makes me feel better? Which makes me more able to handle whatever comes my way? The answer seems so obvious!

I went to see Bruce Springsteen perform this week. I had a bad back, and could have made it worse by standing in a stadium with thousands of others. But I knew better. I knew that there are few better cures for feeling miserable than to go and be inspired by the sheer joie de vivre of this performer! For three hours, I danced, sung and laughed with delight, as he took us on a journey of celebrating being alive.

As Bruce would say: ‘ How can we get this thing started? Let’s have a party!’ So come on, count your blessings and celebrate being alive!

Homework

  1. Stop for a moment and count your blessings today
  2. Find four things to delight in today
  3. Give yourself a present today
  4. Do this every day for a month, no matter what is going on in your life

 

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TAKING STOCK…. IN AN INSPIRING WAY!!

By on February 10, 2003 in Excellent organisations, Ways of thinking

This month’s workshop is about taking stock. I don’t know about you, but I am very good at reviewing, targets, goals, objectives and ultimately my work plan. It’s a necessary process and what I have found over the past couple of years is that my tendency can often be to notice what was missing last year, and what do I need to change to make it better.
I often find it to be a bit of challenge, and what gets lost is what I did actually accomplish.
So this workshop is focused on taking stock with inspiration, doing the same process but actually really seeing and owning what I have achieved, so that I can walk away with a real sense of purpose and renewed enthusiasm.
I suggest taking a blank sheet of paper or a notebook to write down any insights or thoughts that occur to you as you complete these exercises. Have fun!!!
1. List out the areas in your work that are the most important to you. (for example, financial success, relationships, contribution, etc.,)
Take this list and prioritise it.
2. Spend a few moments and write down 3 accomplishments in each area, and be specific. An accomplishment is something that you know for you or another person made a difference. It does not need to be a big thing, it just needs to be important to you.
3. Ok now the fun part… tell at least 1 person about them. This is very important, why? because we all deep down love to be recognised and to know that what we do makes a difference. Actually telling another person allows you to really own it.
4. Now review your list and assess what do I want to keep doing, what do I want to take out and what can I replace it with.
5. Complete the process by writing down 1 specific goal and 1 specific accomplishment for each area that you identified in step 1.
Make sure that you share these with at least 1 other person.
Review the list every 6- 8 weeks to check your progress.

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MAGIC

By on February 1, 2003 in health+well being, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Ways of thinking

I was given a book by the magician David Blaine a while ago, and have found it an irresistible read. I was already fascinated by him because he seems to do magic in a different way to any I have seen before. His book both confirms that belief and explains some of the reasons why.

It has made me think about what magic really is. I have always loved the idea of magic, but been disappointed by the tricks that are usually called by that name. They seem to demean something very special that for me is linked to things like fairies, wizards and the things we classify as miracles. I feel that true magic has a positive effect in some way, and will make us question what we think is possible.

At one stage, the word became a popular way of saying that something was special, or exciting and that felt like a good use of it…

Over Christmas, did you see the face of a child filled with wonder at the magic of Father Christmas? Did you wish that you could experience the magic of those first snowflakes settling on the ground?

We forget to notice the simple everyday magic that surrounds us: the skyscapes on a clear winter’s day, the dew in a spider’s web, the excited grin on a child’s face, the birth of another special human being, the sense of wonder at the amazing world we live in, filled with amazing people.

Homework

  1. Where do you see everyday magic?
  2. What magic can you create for others and for yourself?

 

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THE TROUBLE WITH MONEY

By on January 3, 2003 in emotional intelligence, Meta Org Blog, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

Do you ever worry about not having enough money?  For living, for that holiday, for retirement ……  I know, I can sometimes get caught in the scarcity fears – by the way, if you don’t, please let us know your “secret”?!!

Yet I know that when I think poor, I am poor, and when I think abundance, I notice abundance.  Does this make any sense to you?

We are taught to regard money as the means of being wealthy in our culture, and also to always feel as if we don’t have enough.

Yet we live in an abundant world, where happiness comes from snowdrops flowering, not from money in the bank.  Snowdrops herald the arrival of Spring, first signs of new growth. Money in the bank causes us anxiety, as interest rates go down and it loses value even when we have it.

What would happen if we decided to be rich and enjoy the abundance of the world, instead of worrying about money?  Maybe then it would be put back into perspective.  It’s one of many forms of energy that we can share in.  Perhaps if we paid attention to some of the others, we would reduce the fear, and allow the money we need to come our way!

Just as the fear of losing a relationship can often be enough to become a self-fulfilling prophecy, perhaps the fear of not having enough money is the reason why so many of us seem to not have enough!

Why not experiment with putting money worries to one side for a month and instead enjoy the abundance of new growth in Spring, laughter with friends and the exuberance of children?

Homework :

  1. Buy yourself a small present to make you smile, no matter how poor you feel this month.
  2. Notice what makes you happy that doesn’t require money.
  3. Bless what money you do have and then give a little of it away!

 

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BRINGING OUT THE BEST IN YOURSELF

By on December 11, 2002 in Living fully, Resourcing yourself, Ways of thinking

When was the last time you felt really good about yourself? It is so easy to be self-damning, and so much harder to be self-congratulatory! And somehow in our culture we think that it is a good thing to run ourselves down. I can remember as a small child being told that just because I was a good speller didn’t mean that I should get bigheaded – but I wasn’t! I was just proud of my ability to spell…

Those who make the best of themselves know intuitively that they need to build on their strengths to get even better. They notice their own good points, and see how they can use these to enhance their not so good points. Just as we all thrive on positive feedback from others, we also thrive on positive feedback from ourselves!

So this month, why don’t you start giving yourself some feedback!

Homework

  1. List 10 things you are really good at. It doesn’t matter what they are – work-related or personal
  2. Each day notice 1 thing you do well and remind yourself of how you did it
  3. When someone thanks you for something, or gives you positive feedback, don’t dismiss it – say thank you and revel in it!
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CREATIVITY AT THE SOURCE OF BUSINESS

By on November 10, 2002 in Ways of thinking, Working smarter

For many years, especially in the early days of running a small business, I never quite saw the link between creativity and my work. Creativity for me meant paint a picture, do a drawing, mould a piece of clay, even perhaps do a bit of singing.  Then I started to discover that when I actually did something creative, work and my business seemed to flow that much easier. Here is another paystub maker online review which might help your business.

I started to question for myself what is creativity and saw that in actuality that creativity is full self-expression. It takes many forms and is a natural extension of our gifts.  In coming to accept this realisation, I could begin to clearly see the link to the work I was doing. My work and the business I had created were my way to contribute and share that with others.

The more I accepted the concept that my creativity is my unique self-expression, I found myself with a magical way in which to clearly set my vision, values and actions for starting and maintaining a viable, sustainable business, and the more I allowed and activated my creativity the easier it became.  One of the most helpful exercises I did was to actually define for myself what CREATIVITY meant to me, choosing words that inspired and energised me.   It has become a powerful way of reminding myself of who I am and how to BE in relationship to my business:

C  Clarity

R  Release

E  Ease

A  Action

T  Timely

I  Insight

V  Vital

I  Inspired

T  Transform

Y  You

Homework:

  1. I invite you to take some time to discover the meaning of creativity and what it means in your life and your business.  Take 5-10 minutes of quiet time to remind yourself as to why you started your business.
  2. Write down what creativity means to you, where is it present in your life, where has it made a difference.
  3. Ask yourself where has the use of my creativity really helped in a work situation.

Take the word Creativity and choose powerful, inspiring words to spell it out, then post it somewhere to remind you.

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Being Doing Having

By on September 4, 2002 in Living fully, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

Don’t we all say, sometimes: ‘If only I could win the lottery, then I could go on lots of holidays (or whatever our own dream is) and I would be happy.  Yet every ancient philosophy in the world tells us that it actually works the other way round …. ‘If I choose to be happy, then I do things differently, and I can have anything I want’.

This is very challenging for our minds, which have been trained in the western culture of striving to attain.  We almost want to make it impossible to achieve our dreams, because that proves that we were right – only the lucky ones can do that, and they are very few.

Yet at a gut instinct level, we all know that when we are feeling good, we respond to things differently, and the world seems to work better for us.  It seems worth experimenting with, since we are, most of us, not about to win the lottery!  What would happen if you decided to be happy today?

Homework :

  1. Choose to be happy today, and just notice what happens.
  2. Act as if everything is working well for you for a day, and notice what happens.
  3. At least, practise smiling for a day, and notice what happens!
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Gaining Perspective

By on September 4, 2002 in Meta Org Blog, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

Have you had a summer holiday? I remember when I went to Italy during the summer and was lucky enough to spend three days in Sicily whilst Etna was erupting. We were able to see the incredible sight of a red river of lava, and hear and feel the immense rumbling and thundering which accompanies the eruption.

When stood by such a powerful example of nature at its work, you have to recognise how mundane and temporary our own stories are by comparison.

Whether we are disrupted by changes happening in our lives, or feeling powerful and important because we are being change agents in some way, the immensity of what nature does reminds us to get it all back into perspective.

Who we are and what we do is important and we do have an impact on the world, but we need to be reminded sometimes that there is more to it than our little piece, and we have to work in accord with the grander plan. We also need to remember that whatever is happening now in our lives, this too will pass, and life goes on.

Homework

  1. What experience of nature has reminded you to regain perspective on your life? Remember it again now
  2. What life event at the time seemed all-consuming, but has now become less important, merely another lesson, when you look back? Reflect on its true perspective in your life.
  3. In what way are you working in accord with the grander plan? Reflect on how you play your part.

 

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What Ride are You Choosing?

By on September 4, 2002 in Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

 

‘Have we not told you, life should be an adventure? If it were run-of-the-mill, you would have left it a long time ago. You need the sturm and drang, the passion, the highs and lows, to uncover the truth of who you are.

We get so caught up in our everyday lives, we forget what we came here for. See life as a game. It’s a game, it’s fun, it’s a rollercoaster, as we have told you before. It has its highs and lows, ups and downs, all arounds, but ultimately it’s all just a ride.

To find out what that’s all about, stand back and observe – where you get stuck, where you fly, where it scares you, where it exhilarates you, and concentrate on one goal, one goal alone: How does this help me to get to the truth of who I am?

Does it? Or does it get me stuck? Does it increase my fear? If the answer is yes to either of these questions, choose another path, get on a different ride!

There’s a whole fairground of rides. Some people like the rollercoaster, some the waltzers, some like the slow Ferris wheel, some the house of horrors. They are all beautifully different, so if you feel your ride no longer fits or suits you, change to another one! Go sit on the rollercoaster even if it does sometimes scare you.  Or go sit on the roundabout and take it gently.

You are all grown-ups, you have the right to choose what sort of ride you want your life to be. So choose, choose now – and if you don’t like it, stop that ride, get off and go get an easier one for a while.

It’s your choice. You create what is the ride of your life. So create one that suits you, and have the courage to say, “no, this ride no longer suits me. I’ll choose another – I’ll create another life/ride that suits me.” And hey presto, you have the life you always wanted. It’s that easy.

We would say that you will probably get through a lot of rides, because at different times in your life, you will need different things. And eventually you will come to the ride that takes you to the truth of who you are, and once you are on that one, you will never want to come off, because it’s home.

(Thank you to Jo and his angels for this text)

Homework

  1. What sort of a ride are you on at the moment?
  2. Does it suit you right now?
  3. Is it helping you to get to the truth of who you are?
  4. If not, what ride do you fancy?

 

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