Tag Archives | Thinking Differently

Changing Your Habitual Thinking

By on September 4, 2002 in Meta Org Blog, relating to others, Ways of thinking

Most of us have learnt to think in limiting or negative ways. We consider problems rather than solutions, and notice what’s wrong rather than what’s right.  We do this without even realising it, and it is well engrained as a habit.

So to break it, we need to practice doing something different with our brains: noticing what’s right.

There are simple and enjoyable ways of undertaking this practice. Here are a couple for you to play with.

HOMEWORK

  1. Spend a few minutes thinking about the good points about your family, your work, and being the age you are. List at least ten good points for each category.
  2. Now think of one way you could add another point to each list by taking some action.
  3. And finally, think of a simple way you could show your appreciation for the gifts these categories bring into your life.
  4. Now decide to catch someone doing it right – your partner, child, friend or work colleague. Notice something they do which pleases you and tell them so.

 

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Inside Out

By on September 4, 2002 in Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Ways of thinking

Have you noticed how your mood and state always seem to be how the world is at that time? When we feel good, the world seems full of good news and friendly people; when we feel down, there is always more to be gloomy about!

This is no accident of fate. It is about what we are using to filter the possible information around us. When I feel low, I have on the ‘reasons to feel low’ filter, so I notice lots of them.

It makes sense, therefore, to always work ‘inside out’. That means I work on me first, then start looking outwards. If I can change my mood, I will change what I notice, and will be able to have a more positive impact.

Homework.

  1. Notice how the world reflects your mood.
  2. Give yourself treats to make you feel good, and notice how the world also feels easier to handle.

 

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HOW I AM AFFECTS HOW I WORK WITH OTHERS – REALLY!!

By on September 4, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Excellent organisations, Leadership, Meta Org Blog, relating to others, Working smarter

‘I’ve always prided myself on being good at analytical/logical thinking, and when I was asked if I would like to go on a programme on developing my skills as a leader I thought I would learn to be even more logical and analytical. Half way through my first day all I could do was shake my head in disbelief.

We had spent the whole morning looking at ways I could make myself feel good and, although that was very pleasant, it felt both selfish and irrelevant to me as a leader.

The workshop facilitator persisted in looking at personal stuff for the rest of the afternoon, which was spent on how I think. Analytical? Nope! My intuition, for goodness sake! I haven’t used that since I was a child. I went home and told my wife that it was a most unexpected day. Two hours later she told me to shut up.

I was curious about the next day and had to admit I felt rather good about myself. As we began to explore what made a good leader I realised that I had what it took, but it wasn’t what I thought it was.

Since that five day session I think I have used about half of what I learned with Di – which is about 100%, at least, more than I have taken from other courses. It makes more and more sense, and it works. No, it really works.’

—————

Di says:

Adam spent the whole of the first day staring at me and shaking his head in disbelief. I could feel his gaze on me the whole time.

It’s a common reaction. At first many people think I am crazy. And I remind them that, when they do get themselves in a state where they feel good abut themselves, they are in a superb position to help others get more from their work.

Western society’s love affair with logical and analytical thought reflects a belief that science could solve all of our ‘problems’ This ‘logic’ breaks work down into boring and meaningless tasks, so that the work does not inspire and motivate, and ultimately the work gets done badly. Nice logic!

We have got to the stage in our culture where many of us think that work has to be boring, hard, stressful. If not, the story runs, we are not earning our money or our leisure time: “work hard, play hard’.

Homework

1. Enjoy your work today.

2. Give yourself some treats: stop and smell that flower, smile at that toddler, use your favourite soap, wear your favourite clothes.

3. Take a risk: go in after the traffic, leave your tie at home, leave your e-mails until you have spoken to everyone face-to-face

Enjoy your work today.

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Experimenting

By on March 10, 2002 in Change, emotional intelligence, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Ways of thinking

Why do we have to get it right first time, every time, or else we feel bad? It just doesn’t fit with our experience as humans does it? And it certainly doesn’t fit with being a learner! Actually we don’t call it experimenting, we call it ‘getting it wrong’ – no wonder it makes us feel bad!

Yet the way we grow in our lives is by trying things out, and gradually establishing what works for us. No, it’s even more than that, it is continually experimenting, because what works for us at one point, may change within moments, and as we move into it, we can see even more possibilities.

As children, this way of growing into our true selves comes naturally to us. We love to experiment and find different ways of doing things, thinking about things, and reacting to things. It is only a taught behaviour to try and find the ‘right’ answer that will last forever.

So let’s be children again! Let’s experiment and play with ideas and approaches. And don’t feel bad if your experiment is not perfect – be delighted that you have more exploring to do!

  1. Experiment with a different route home, or a new type of cereal for breakfast – anything that takes your fancy!
  2. Next time something doesn’t work quite how you intended, smile to yourself and say, ‘great! More experimenting to do!’ (OK, I know that’s a tough one, but it might at least make you laugh instead of being upset! After all, it’s not the end of the world!)
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Tune in, Turn on, Chill out.

By on March 5, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself

In the busy world of illusion, we have very little time to ourselves.

Everything has to be done now! – the kids need feeding, the garden needs weeding, got to get to work, got to go shopping, must visit dad, better do the hoovering, must put the washing on, gotta get home-we never stop! We never take a time-out from the hectic lives we lead.

We end up over-worked, stressed, out-of-balance, feeling empty/low/under appreciated, het-up and tense- so why not give yourself some appreciation, wash those daily hectic blues away!

In this month’s workshop we’ll be finding out about finding time for yourself.

How? It’s simple-really simple.

Just take 15 minutes a day that you dedicate to yourself. A time for you and you only, that no-one or no-thing can interrupt or interfere with.

Find a quiet place, sit in a comfortable position, light a candle or incense if you would like.

Put on some relaxing instrumental music or simply listen to the sounds of nature/life.

Close your eyes-and breathe.
Breathe in, breathe out – that’s all you have to do.

Initially your mind will probably fill with 101 things you have to do or sort out yet today, but just let the thoughts pass without connecting with them, and soon they will pass.

Continue breathing deeply, but naturally until the 15 minutes are up.

The great thing about this exercise is that it can be done anywhere: on the train or bus, as a passenger in a car, in the office, anywhere that you can shut your eyes for 15 minutes and breathe.

You should find yourself feeling lighter, thinking clearer and re-energised. Ideally it is a good start to the day and it is also good to aid peaceful sleep at night.

As you get used to taking the 15 minute ‘ Me Break ‘, you may find that 15 minutes is just not enough Me Time, so lengthen the time to suit your needs.

So To Re-cap

When you wake, or when you get stressed, or the strains of life are getting to you..

REMEMBER .. It’s time to:

1.Tune In: Find a quiet spot to tune in to your inner self and the body you inhabit.

2.Turn on: Just 15-20 mins a day gives you time to revitalise tired bodies and minds.

3.Chill out: Breathing deeply for 15-20 minutes will leave you feeling lighter, calmer and more relaxed.

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