CHANGING YOUR ‘STORY’

We often talk on our programmes about how you can change the story-line in your life, because you are in charge of it. There has been a lot of discussion in our household about the new era we have entered into – the age of Aquarius – and how it is the time to really create the story you want in your life. And it has reminded me that there are a couple of things that are vital to making that transition easier, and more comfortable.

Firstly, we need to be clear about what our criteria are for accepting or rejecting things that have been a part of our lives up until now. This applies whether it is changing jobs, friends, or possessions – it applies to everything. What I mean by criteria is clarity in why you will choose to reject or accept something. For example, I have decided to have another grand sort-out and established that I would only keep in my life those things that make my heart sing. It is a simple but very effective criterion!

Secondly, and equally importantly, we need to be in touch with our own ecology signal – the message from our ‘guts’ that tells us if something is right or wrong for us at this time. This signal will help us to stay comfortable with the change by helping us to pace it to suit ourselves in a true sense.

An example for me was my books: I knew that only some of them genuinely make my heart sing still, yet it is a long-standing habit to buy and save books in case I want to read them again. After much consideration, I decided that I could divide my books into three categories: ones I didn’t want any more and could give away; ones that I love to dip into and have my notes in; and ones that I may want to read again, but can happily store on kindle rather than as physical books. Now I can go through them and clear many of them whilst still feeling good about it – my ecology signal says yes!

When it comes to adding to our story, we equally need to pace ourselves to stay comfortable – this is not an all or nothing game! So go gently, perhaps adding a little bit of new activity, or a gentle beginning to changing a non-useful habit.

It doesn’t matter what pace you go at in changing your story, so long as you do keep gradually evolving that wonderful life of yours. And if you do decide to go for the ‘grand slam’ like I tend to, you are still entitled to keep it comfortable for yourself!

So stop for a moment, next time you are sitting having a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, and ask yourself: ‘Is there anything I want to take out of my life, to evolve my story today, or is there anything I still need to keep even though it doesn’t really fit?’ then ask yourself, ‘what do I want to begin to add into my life to evolve it and myself further?’ And enjoy the answers you get..

 

About Di Kamp

Di Kamp is chief executive of Meta and has been involved in the field of developing people and organisations for 35 years. She has worked with a variety of organisations, and specialises in enabling senior managers to guide their organisations from good enough to excellence, and enabling management teams to lead their people in a way that will enhance their performance. Di has written several books, including manuals for trainers, one on staff appraisals, one on workplace counselling, one on improving your excellence as a trainer, one on people skills, and one on being a 21st century manager. She is currently preparing a further book on the secret of sustainable successful organisations.

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