Tag Archives | Thinking Differently

HOW I AM AFFECTS HOW I WORK WITH OTHERS – REALLY!!

By on September 4, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Excellent organisations, Leadership, Meta Org Blog, relating to others, Working smarter

‘I’ve always prided myself on being good at analytical/logical thinking, and when I was asked if I would like to go on a programme on developing my skills as a leader I thought I would learn to be even more logical and analytical. Half way through my first day all I could do was shake my head in disbelief.

We had spent the whole morning looking at ways I could make myself feel good and, although that was very pleasant, it felt both selfish and irrelevant to me as a leader.

The workshop facilitator persisted in looking at personal stuff for the rest of the afternoon, which was spent on how I think. Analytical? Nope! My intuition, for goodness sake! I haven’t used that since I was a child. I went home and told my wife that it was a most unexpected day. Two hours later she told me to shut up.

I was curious about the next day and had to admit I felt rather good about myself. As we began to explore what made a good leader I realised that I had what it took, but it wasn’t what I thought it was.

Since that five day session I think I have used about half of what I learned with Di – which is about 100%, at least, more than I have taken from other courses. It makes more and more sense, and it works. No, it really works.’

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Di says:

Adam spent the whole of the first day staring at me and shaking his head in disbelief. I could feel his gaze on me the whole time.

It’s a common reaction. At first many people think I am crazy. And I remind them that, when they do get themselves in a state where they feel good abut themselves, they are in a superb position to help others get more from their work.

Western society’s love affair with logical and analytical thought reflects a belief that science could solve all of our ‘problems’ This ‘logic’ breaks work down into boring and meaningless tasks, so that the work does not inspire and motivate, and ultimately the work gets done badly. Nice logic!

We have got to the stage in our culture where many of us think that work has to be boring, hard, stressful. If not, the story runs, we are not earning our money or our leisure time: “work hard, play hard’.

Homework

1. Enjoy your work today.

2. Give yourself some treats: stop and smell that flower, smile at that toddler, use your favourite soap, wear your favourite clothes.

3. Take a risk: go in after the traffic, leave your tie at home, leave your e-mails until you have spoken to everyone face-to-face

Enjoy your work today.

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Gaining Perspective

By on September 4, 2002 in Meta Org Blog, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

Have you had a summer holiday? I remember when I went to Italy during the summer and was lucky enough to spend three days in Sicily whilst Etna was erupting. We were able to see the incredible sight of a red river of lava, and hear and feel the immense rumbling and thundering which accompanies the eruption.

When stood by such a powerful example of nature at its work, you have to recognise how mundane and temporary our own stories are by comparison.

Whether we are disrupted by changes happening in our lives, or feeling powerful and important because we are being change agents in some way, the immensity of what nature does reminds us to get it all back into perspective.

Who we are and what we do is important and we do have an impact on the world, but we need to be reminded sometimes that there is more to it than our little piece, and we have to work in accord with the grander plan. We also need to remember that whatever is happening now in our lives, this too will pass, and life goes on.

Homework

  1. What experience of nature has reminded you to regain perspective on your life? Remember it again now
  2. What life event at the time seemed all-consuming, but has now become less important, merely another lesson, when you look back? Reflect on its true perspective in your life.
  3. In what way are you working in accord with the grander plan? Reflect on how you play your part.

 

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What Ride are You Choosing?

By on September 4, 2002 in Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Self awareness, Ways of thinking

 

‘Have we not told you, life should be an adventure? If it were run-of-the-mill, you would have left it a long time ago. You need the sturm and drang, the passion, the highs and lows, to uncover the truth of who you are.

We get so caught up in our everyday lives, we forget what we came here for. See life as a game. It’s a game, it’s fun, it’s a rollercoaster, as we have told you before. It has its highs and lows, ups and downs, all arounds, but ultimately it’s all just a ride.

To find out what that’s all about, stand back and observe – where you get stuck, where you fly, where it scares you, where it exhilarates you, and concentrate on one goal, one goal alone: How does this help me to get to the truth of who I am?

Does it? Or does it get me stuck? Does it increase my fear? If the answer is yes to either of these questions, choose another path, get on a different ride!

There’s a whole fairground of rides. Some people like the rollercoaster, some the waltzers, some like the slow Ferris wheel, some the house of horrors. They are all beautifully different, so if you feel your ride no longer fits or suits you, change to another one! Go sit on the rollercoaster even if it does sometimes scare you.  Or go sit on the roundabout and take it gently.

You are all grown-ups, you have the right to choose what sort of ride you want your life to be. So choose, choose now – and if you don’t like it, stop that ride, get off and go get an easier one for a while.

It’s your choice. You create what is the ride of your life. So create one that suits you, and have the courage to say, “no, this ride no longer suits me. I’ll choose another – I’ll create another life/ride that suits me.” And hey presto, you have the life you always wanted. It’s that easy.

We would say that you will probably get through a lot of rides, because at different times in your life, you will need different things. And eventually you will come to the ride that takes you to the truth of who you are, and once you are on that one, you will never want to come off, because it’s home.

(Thank you to Jo and his angels for this text)

Homework

  1. What sort of a ride are you on at the moment?
  2. Does it suit you right now?
  3. Is it helping you to get to the truth of who you are?
  4. If not, what ride do you fancy?

 

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Experimenting

By on March 10, 2002 in Change, emotional intelligence, Living fully, Meta Org Blog, Ways of thinking

Why do we have to get it right first time, every time, or else we feel bad? It just doesn’t fit with our experience as humans does it? And it certainly doesn’t fit with being a learner! Actually we don’t call it experimenting, we call it ‘getting it wrong’ – no wonder it makes us feel bad!

Yet the way we grow in our lives is by trying things out, and gradually establishing what works for us. No, it’s even more than that, it is continually experimenting, because what works for us at one point, may change within moments, and as we move into it, we can see even more possibilities.

As children, this way of growing into our true selves comes naturally to us. We love to experiment and find different ways of doing things, thinking about things, and reacting to things. It is only a taught behaviour to try and find the ‘right’ answer that will last forever.

So let’s be children again! Let’s experiment and play with ideas and approaches. And don’t feel bad if your experiment is not perfect – be delighted that you have more exploring to do!

  1. Experiment with a different route home, or a new type of cereal for breakfast – anything that takes your fancy!
  2. Next time something doesn’t work quite how you intended, smile to yourself and say, ‘great! More experimenting to do!’ (OK, I know that’s a tough one, but it might at least make you laugh instead of being upset! After all, it’s not the end of the world!)
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Tune in, Turn on, Chill out.

By on March 5, 2002 in emotional intelligence, Meta Org Blog, Resourcing yourself

In the busy world of illusion, we have very little time to ourselves.

Everything has to be done now! – the kids need feeding, the garden needs weeding, got to get to work, got to go shopping, must visit dad, better do the hoovering, must put the washing on, gotta get home-we never stop! We never take a time-out from the hectic lives we lead.

We end up over-worked, stressed, out-of-balance, feeling empty/low/under appreciated, het-up and tense- so why not give yourself some appreciation, wash those daily hectic blues away!

In this month’s workshop we’ll be finding out about finding time for yourself.

How? It’s simple-really simple.

Just take 15 minutes a day that you dedicate to yourself. A time for you and you only, that no-one or no-thing can interrupt or interfere with.

Find a quiet place, sit in a comfortable position, light a candle or incense if you would like.

Put on some relaxing instrumental music or simply listen to the sounds of nature/life.

Close your eyes-and breathe.
Breathe in, breathe out – that’s all you have to do.

Initially your mind will probably fill with 101 things you have to do or sort out yet today, but just let the thoughts pass without connecting with them, and soon they will pass.

Continue breathing deeply, but naturally until the 15 minutes are up.

The great thing about this exercise is that it can be done anywhere: on the train or bus, as a passenger in a car, in the office, anywhere that you can shut your eyes for 15 minutes and breathe.

You should find yourself feeling lighter, thinking clearer and re-energised. Ideally it is a good start to the day and it is also good to aid peaceful sleep at night.

As you get used to taking the 15 minute ‘ Me Break ‘, you may find that 15 minutes is just not enough Me Time, so lengthen the time to suit your needs.

So To Re-cap

When you wake, or when you get stressed, or the strains of life are getting to you..

REMEMBER .. It’s time to:

1.Tune In: Find a quiet spot to tune in to your inner self and the body you inhabit.

2.Turn on: Just 15-20 mins a day gives you time to revitalise tired bodies and minds.

3.Chill out: Breathing deeply for 15-20 minutes will leave you feeling lighter, calmer and more relaxed.

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